Change Your Reality

3 min read


I changed outfits three times before going to a recent networking dinner.  I was working on a project that had some glitches and didn’t get ready to go out until the last minute.  Not only didn’t I finish the project, I had to scramble to find something to wear before my friend arrived to drive me to the meeting.  I ended up running out of the house in a top I borrowed from my daughter and fastening my shoes and cleaning my glasses in the car, where I remembered, too late, that I forgot to brush my hair.

As you can imagine, I was feeling at loose ends, both mentally and physically, when I arrived at the meeting.  I felt rushed and stressed and was sure I looked that way too.  The first words I heard at the meeting were from Marilyn who said, “Lisa you are looking very … very ….” and as she was searching for the word, my mind was racing to all the ways I was feeling – rushed, frazzled, a mess.  Just as I said to her, “You really are going to have to finish that sentence”, she found the words and said “put together and confident.”  I laughed out loud, both from relief and at the irony.  I couldn’t have felt any less put together and confident at that moment.

The topic of the speaker that night was Mirror, Mirror – Do You Trust What You See?  How appropriate!  I saw one thing and Marilyn saw another – our realities were very different until Marilyn changed my reality with her comment.  All of a sudden I was no longer a dishevelled mess.  I was put together and confident.  Cool!

Reality is really perception and perspective.  I assumed that I looked on the outside the same way that I felt on the inside.  I forgot that I can only see from my own limited perspective, which doesn’t always include all the information required to get an accurate picture.  It reminded me of the time I took a drawing class and only had the back view of what appeared to be a male mannequin.  However, when I walked around to the other side of the room, I saw very clearly that the front view revealed a large busted female mannequin.  Different perspective, different reality!

Other people don’t see all our inner turmoil.  Mentally I hadn’t moved on from scrambling to find something decent to wear.  Physically I had found a nice outfit, fastened my shoes, cleaned my glasses, and tidied up my hair on my way into the meeting.  The story I was telling myself was different from my actual physical reality.

So how could I have done for myself what Marilyn did for me that night?  I could have taken a moment to stop and breathe before going into the meeting.  I could have looked in the mirror and reminded myself that I was right where I was supposed to be – that all was well in this moment.  I could have left the stress of getting ready back where it belonged, in the past.  Just like the mannequin, if I had taken the time to look at my situation from another angle I would have seen what was actually there – the finished product, not the chaos it took to get there.  Think differently, feel differently.  Change your mind, change your reality.

About Lisa Ivaldi

Lisa loves sharing information that will have a positive impact. is a personal growth blog that uses personal stories and expert theories to share ideas and perspectives. Sometimes looking at things slightly differently can make a huge difference.
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4 Responses to Change Your Reality

  1. Fantastic article Lisa. We all have felt kafuffled on the inside but as you say, outside you look marvellous. Keep up the great work we all need to hear this reality.

  2. Anja Gangur says:

    Great blog as always, Lisa. Feel free to post it on the Guelph Online Networking Group on LinkedIn. Anja Date: Thu, 12 Nov 2015 17:05:31 +0000 To:

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